We’ve fallen before. The scrapes on our knees and arms make sure that out history of kung fu fighting in our backyards and playing superman off the couch is nigh unforgettable. We could also fall into open manholes, pits, depression (Yes, the twenty first century is adding new holes, physical and otherwise for us to fall into, but that’s a story for another day.) No fall is ever really as disorienting an experience as falling in love.
Love isn’t scientific, Einstein himself said, you can’t blame gravity for falling in love. It could have you feeling upside down, over the moon, beside yourself, and all other sorts of emotional contortions that would have been otherwise impossible. You never really see it, Love, it comes like an assassin, you blink once and it has you in its embrace. The funniest part is that you develop Stockholm syndrome almost immediately, you begin moving like a marionet, dancing to Aphrodite’s tune.
It requires either immense stupidity or tons upon tons of bravery to fall in love. It’s like bungee jumping, the results go either one of two ways, you fall and the tether retracts, giving you the greatest high of your life, or the tether snaps and well, that’s that. You’d think it’s never that serious, but there is a reason love crime is a word in the dictionary.
If you want to be loved, be lovable, Ovid said this some thousand years ago but waaay later, in 2021, some people took that personally, and ran with it. A small peek into the internet will bring you into contact with, make up tutorials, dressing gurus, master pick up artists and mistresses of seduction. A select group of people devoted their time on this planet to being as lovable as is humanly possible without breaking into the “Cute as a puppy.” territory, with devastating effectiveness.
The science of beautifying oneself has come so far from the days of rouge, as to being able to turn a veritable girl next door (Not that I have any issue with girls next door, most are lovely) into a sultry Aphrodite in the time it takes for a child to chase and catch a chicken. The transformation however does not only stop there, the pursuit for lovability has gone far further than skin deep.
Seduction, for either gender, has been so developed as to become an artform, and that’s saying something considering that for more than half of our day, if you look through the corner of your eye you can see a semi naked human being, either on a screen, a poster, or in some particularly “Developed” areas of the world, on the street. There is an abundance of knowledge so vast and so comprehensive that, with near minimal effort, even the reincarnation of Huck Finn could be cultivated into a suave Casanova.
Its difficult, in this day and age, to know whether you are falling in love with an actual being or a carefully created persona. Maybe that’s why people have given their hearts over to tinder, like fast food, you never really expect fast (Wo)men to be of good quality, you can’t get disappointed if you have no expectations no? And you can order from home to boot. But what do I know? The longest love affair I’ve had is with my teapot.